By Mollie Mansfield
A distressed partner has spoken out about how her man buys her the worst Christmas presents ever – from BRICKS to TOILET SEATS.
Jayne Herbert, 63, has been left disappointed every Christmas as her partner of 12-years, John Nettleton, 72, has continued to buy her boring presents.
Over the years the hospital worker has unwrapped a toilet seat, bricks, wheelbarrow, high vis jacket, TV bracket, steel-toe capped boots, strip lights and even having woken up to her air conditioning unit being re-gassed.
But John, an industrial chemist, insists that the presents are always both practical and meaningful to make Jayne’s life a little bit easier.
Jayne, from Mansfield, Notts, said: “John definitely buys me the worst Christmas presents in the world – every year I’m left waiting to see how he can top the last year.
“I tend to ask for perfume, or something nice that I wouldn’t buy myself, but every year I’m left disappointed.
“I have received all sorts of things but John is sure they always have a purpose and that they’re simply just practical presents.
“He bought me a toilet seat one year, because my sister had cracked mine and the seat wouldn’t go down properly.
“And one year he took it upon himself to re-gas my air conditioning unit as my present.”
John said: “I’m Mr. Practicality through and through!
“I buy the presents mainly because they fit into projects we’ve been doing – for example I bought the wheelbarrow because we were making a pond in the garden and needed one.
“Some things are too big to wrap, like the big pile of bricks – so that year I just had to present her with the lorry and say ‘there you are love, take your pick!’
“I love buying Jayne’s Christmas presents, I pick something that’s practical and useful and can’t wait to see her face when she opens them every year.”
Jayne explains that over the past decade she has given up hope on receiving a present she has asked for, due to John always opting for a more practical solution.
She said: “After I bought my house, I really got into renovating and decorating it, and John would always help out – so the presents tended to derive from that.
“He bought me bricks to help extend the conservatory, and strip lights to help me see in the garden shed.
“Other presents have included a TV bracket, toilet seat, and a high-vis jacket and steel-toe capped boots in case I ever get into any trouble if I’m stuck on the side of the motorway.
“I don’t get excited to see what I’m going to get every year anymore, it’s more anxiety that I get than anything.
“This year I’ve asked for my favourite perfume, but I’ve got a feeling he’s going to buy me a Christmas tree – as I haven’t got a big one this year!”
But despite Jayne having to go through the anxious lead-up to Christmas, she explains that her friends and family can’t wait to see what John has bought her.
She added: “Christmas day is full of phone calls from my friends and family asking what he’s got me this year.
“It wouldn’t be Christmas without John buying me rubbish presents – and it’s become part of everyone’s festive routine!
“As much as I despise the presents he buys me, it still makes me laugh year after year when I unwrap something even more ridiculous from the last.
“Maybe one year I’ll get the flowers and perfume I’ve always been waiting for!”